I wasn’t sure what was on my heart this morning, so I didn’t know what to write. And then someone gave me a letter that reduced me to sobs. It was actually a good thing. The tears have been there all day, just behind my eyes, threatening to overtake me. I haven’t been able to access them, and this letter did the trick. It was also incredibly beautiful, so I feel the need to share. It was written by someone who loves James very much.
“One night after James died, I had a dream or a vision, or something that popped into my head. I wasn’t really asleep, but it just came to me.
It is in the future, and I know that I have died. Suddenly, I am in a beautiful green field. It’s so green and bright. There are lots of people milling around and suddenly, out of the crowd, a tall boy of about 10 or so runs up to me. He has crazy, dark hair and dark blue eyes. He holds out his hand to me and says, “I’m so glad that you’re here. I have so much to show you.” And just for a second, I see a tiny clenched fist reaching for me, and then it’s a big, strong hand again.
And I take his hand, and we turn and run towards the most beautiful city of gold in the distance…laughing as we go.
It is very real to me. I believe God sent it for my comfort, and it will happen one day.”
I hope it’s real too. I hope one day that I will see my sweet son again. I miss him so terribly.