This is supposed to be such a joyous and fun thing to do. Packing that “go bag” and getting ready for the ride to the hospital.
I decided to try and make it fun for myself. I went and bought a new bag that I really like, as well as a new cosmetics/toiletries bag. I bought new PJs and a new robe for the hospital.
This was 3 days ago. Since then, it has sat in my bedroom untouched, waiting.
I have no idea what to pack in it other than the PJs and toiletries. Should I pack a going home outfit for James? Will he ever come home with us? Should I pick an outfit that would work as both a going home outfit and a burial outfit, should he not make it home? What size clothing should I pack? Preemie size? He’s likely to be very small, and I don’t have any preemie boy clothing, nor do I want to buy any for a variety of reasons.
What should I pack for myself as far as clothing? Will I be there a couple of days recovering from a vaginal birth, or will I be there 3-4 or more recovering from c-section and hovering over my son in the NICU?
Should we even put the carseat in the car? Will he ever ride in it? Will having it there for the next several weeks just remind me of all that is coming?
There are so many questions revolving around this innocent looking bag, and I don’t have answers for any of them. So it remains, waiting. Just like me.